Week 5, Intuitive Eating Challenge for Isabelle & Lilly

Isabelle

This week has been a bit up and down, I've had some really, really good days and some really really bad days.  Today for example, was one of those bad days.  I was all on my own at home, had no study or work to do so had a great lazy day just watching movies and doing nothing of value.  I went to the supermarket and got myself a few treats, which ideally should last the week, except, they haven't.  I wasn't hungry, but I was bored, there was no one to witness me being a piggy and there is something about tim tams that i just can't say no to.  So that's the whole pack gone, along with heaps more food that I wasn't hungry for, or craving, it was just there and for some reason self control and reasoning didn't kick in.  But now the guilt has kicked in, knowing i've let myself down and I'm actually feeling pretty sick since all that food too!  But I also need to remind myself that tomorrow is another day, and there is no point dwelling on today.  It's been a good reminder - the guilt and sick feeling really isn't worth gorging myself.

I know my cues, I know when I'm hungry and when I can stop eating, I just need to remember to acknowledge that instead of ignoring it.

Unfortunately, I have put on 200g this week but this little reminder to pay attention to my feelings has been beneficial!

Lilly
 

This has been mostly a good week however, there's been some anxiety and a feeling of not fitting in. I have found that I am applying reframing to many situations, but not really my food. This is because food is becoming more and more neutral.  Instead of feeling bad about something, remedying by eating too much and then focussing all my negativity and guilt on my weight and ‘eating problems’ I have begun to be conscious of my emotions and separately conscious of eating, even if I choose to have a little too much. I have spent years and years speaking harshly to myself for overeating rather than being kind to myself because I feel down about something and for once in my life, my emotions and my food are mostly separated. Of course I have fallen over a couple of times and tried to drown this week’s issues with food, but there is no despair or helplessness in this. In fact, I have never felt happier and more in control. Even when I feel impatient and down about the time that it will take to reach my ideal weight, I can look and see that I am already about ¼ of the way there. I am feeling more and more freedom with food and it is literally liberating me in all aspects of my life. 

101 yay!

Week 4, Intuitive Eating Challenge for Isabelle & Lilly

Isabelle

I would say this has been a good week.  I'm feeling much more in touch with myself, in terms of my hunger and emotions.  I've been trying really hard to focus on my hunger and satiety this week, and it's worked!  I've definitely eaten less this week, and when I've had the feelings of 'I just want to eat' I have managed to put them aside and distract myself with other things until I am actually hungry, which for me, is a pretty big deal!

I've had all the so called 'bad foods' that I tried to avoid before, but just in smaller quantities than I may have indulged in previously, and for instance last night got thai takeaways for dinner only to find I didn't need much of it to feel satisfied, so put the rest in the fridge and finished it for lunch today, when before I would have eaten it all, just because it was there. 

I'm feeling a lot more positive about the process, just hoping I can really stay on track and watch the weight fall off!

This week, I have lost another 600g :-) I'm now 76.9kg

Lilly

I am really beginning to feel free. I am not perfect in following the 3 principles, but I no longer beat myself up; my success each day does not rely on an accounting of how ‘good’ I was and how hard I worked out. It’s actually been 3 weeks since I participated in structured exercise, 3 weeks since I monitored my every choice regarding food. It is lovely to simply realise you are hungry and simply eat something delicious.

Regarding my emotional eating, I am beginning a new process this week. I have heard some wonderful things said about how new lives, new opportunities and great joy involve a great deal of risk and faith. Right now, I can only see one step in front of me. It’s a challenge for such a control freak, and I sometimes turn to food to feel that sense of control. It’s like having a best friend. She says she knows what I need. She’s been so embracing, warm and comfortable, but now she holds me back. She’s fearful and doesn’t want me to change. 

 

This week, I am saying goodbye to my destructive best friend: my ‘fat chick’ alter ego. She needs to move out.

I've just moved, and haven't had access to any scales this week... So it will be interesting to see what my results are next week. 

Tragedies, trials, and tough times...

               None of us seem to be able to escape them. Sometimes just one experience can affect us for a lifetime, while some just find that the difficulties in between life’s sun shiny days are getting more and more frequent…  We’ve all had experiences we wish we could have avoided; that we wish never came our way… There are times I wished the earth would have opened up and swallowed me whole; it probably would’ve been less painful. 

              

               Alas there is no immunity. And while we sometimes get the fleeting feeling that our own plight pales in comparison to the challenges of another… It’s way too big of a stretch to honestly say that we could feel blessed to be in our situation... I often felt deep down (in a way you can’t even tell yourself) that no one had it harder than me… That life had made a mistake choosing me to be the bearer of this unwelcomed experience.  Sometimes when I was listening to someone talk about their current difficulties I would almost felt like stealing the show… stepping out onto stage, squinting into the bright lights, signaling the background music and telling my own sore tale… OK so maybe I was a bit little dramatic back then… lol Maybe I am a bit dramatic now…

             

But now I know that we’ve all experienced things, we once believed were impossible to endure. Hemingway shares “The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places.” Looking back on your own challenges from the past could you think of ways that it has made you stronger…

   

My 18 year struggle with food and weight has given me my purpose, mission and passion. Without my own struggle I wouldn’t have learned so much about myself. Overcoming those unproductive behaviors has given me freedom! Was it worth it – Absolutely! Did I think so at the time… Hell NO! The further I get from that time… the more I’m able appreciate it ♥ I love this quote from Iyanla Vanzant, "Sometimes you have to lose everything in order to gain yourself." And thanks heavens I have me ♥ So whatever your current situation, know that it can make you stronger, it could be a future blessing for you or maybe it’s just to help you find yourself!

I’ll leave you with this one from Byron Katie,  “Life is simple. Everything happens for you, not to you. Everything happens at exactly the right moment, neither too soon nor too late. You don’t have to like it… it’s just easier if you do."

It's not my fault - Fat Thought

“Fat Thought” 

It’s not my fault!

One of the most prevalent thoughts among those who struggle with their weight is, ‘It’s not my fault!’ It’s my Mother, she fed me too much. It’s my Father; he always drinks all weekend long. It’s my Aunty she always gave me sweets when I was sad, My Nana always served desserts after dinner, My Boyfriend is just one of those guys who can eat anything… We’ve heard so many unique variations on this. We had a plethora of people we blamed for our trouble with weight too! 

Blaming others seems to help us understand our situation better in the moment, but the truth... whenever we blame others for our choices, we render ourselves powerless to change. Because it’ true, all the people in our lives have differing degrees of influence over our thoughts, choices and behavior. But they have no more power to affect us than we choose to give them.

 “Slim Thought”  

I am responsible for me, I can create what I want, I’m free to choose.

Once Gina and I decided to take responsibility for ourselves we started becoming more aware of what we were choosing each moment. Once we saw opportunities to make choices, we focused more on what choices would be the ones to help us mover forward to where we wanted to be.

So many people avoid this step because it means acknowledging that we are the only ones who have gotten ourselves where they are. And that can hurt a lot, I was a size 20 at my biggest and it was so hard for me I didn’t want to admit that I had gotten myself there. But without making that painful step, you can’t go on to realize that you are the only one with the power to change your reality. So accepting this pain brings incredible power. Gina has an awesome affirmation that reminds us, ‘I am responsible for everything I think, feel, say and do’. It helps us to feel the power that comes when we know that we are free to choose in every moment. To know that we have to live with the consequences of our own actions.

Some people struggle with this idea, because it can plunge them into a pit of guilt. They feel so disappointed in themselves for making some of the decisions that they have in the past. This is likewise unproductive. We are each moving through out own personally trailored life of developing awareness and responsibility. We are always increasing in our understanding of our freedom wot choose and what a powerful gift it is. Rather than wallow in a pit of guilt and regretful decide make better use of your freedom from this very moment! What’s done is now thankfully in the past, and you are free to start creating what you do truly want for yourself today.