Tragedies, trials, and tough times...

               None of us seem to be able to escape them. Sometimes just one experience can affect us for a lifetime, while some just find that the difficulties in between life’s sun shiny days are getting more and more frequent…  We’ve all had experiences we wish we could have avoided; that we wish never came our way… There are times I wished the earth would have opened up and swallowed me whole; it probably would’ve been less painful. 

              

               Alas there is no immunity. And while we sometimes get the fleeting feeling that our own plight pales in comparison to the challenges of another… It’s way too big of a stretch to honestly say that we could feel blessed to be in our situation... I often felt deep down (in a way you can’t even tell yourself) that no one had it harder than me… That life had made a mistake choosing me to be the bearer of this unwelcomed experience.  Sometimes when I was listening to someone talk about their current difficulties I would almost felt like stealing the show… stepping out onto stage, squinting into the bright lights, signaling the background music and telling my own sore tale… OK so maybe I was a bit little dramatic back then… lol Maybe I am a bit dramatic now…

             

But now I know that we’ve all experienced things, we once believed were impossible to endure. Hemingway shares “The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places.” Looking back on your own challenges from the past could you think of ways that it has made you stronger…

   

My 18 year struggle with food and weight has given me my purpose, mission and passion. Without my own struggle I wouldn’t have learned so much about myself. Overcoming those unproductive behaviors has given me freedom! Was it worth it – Absolutely! Did I think so at the time… Hell NO! The further I get from that time… the more I’m able appreciate it ♥ I love this quote from Iyanla Vanzant, "Sometimes you have to lose everything in order to gain yourself." And thanks heavens I have me ♥ So whatever your current situation, know that it can make you stronger, it could be a future blessing for you or maybe it’s just to help you find yourself!

I’ll leave you with this one from Byron Katie,  “Life is simple. Everything happens for you, not to you. Everything happens at exactly the right moment, neither too soon nor too late. You don’t have to like it… it’s just easier if you do."

What is Authenticty?

Living true to who we really are allows us to live from a place of real power. We have more presence, focus and awareness to give ourselves fully to every moment. Authentic can be defined as genuine; real; not false. So, what does ‘genuine’ mean? Being genuine is being free from pretense or hypocrisy; it’s being sincere. Being authentic is living true to who you really are. It’s dropping the façade, dropping the pretense and being your genuine real self.

And sure, you may be thinking… “How can I be who I really am all the time?” Sure enough, being our real authentic genuine self may not always be comfortable or convenient. We are not saying that you need to be 100% you all of the time from the very start. There may be circumstances that do require you to play a role, and tone down or play up elements of yourself that will support that situation.

Once upon a time, we all were authentic - all the time. As little children we loved who we were and felt joy living true to our real authentic self. But life (family, friends, school, church, society ect) taught us that not everyone is always going to support or approve of all that we naturally are… So we began adjusting ourselves. Pushing down parts of ourselves that didn’t win us approval, putting on a safer face to make someone else happy or more comfortable around us. 

So, the real problem here is that some of us have been doing inauthenticity for so long… that you may have forgotten who you really are and what being who you really are feels like? It’s easy to believe that our façade is who we really are. If you’re not dropping the social mask/facade even amongst your closest friends and family, it could be a sign that you need to re-connect with your real self again… Start by focusing on finding that fabulous inner you. She’s there, always has been. And Gina and I have noticed how that inner true self is always trying to get our attention and help us to re-connect. Living more from that place as often as we can is the first step to claiming back our genuine authentic self.

The fun thing is that being who you really are is actually effortless, relaxing, easy and it feels liberating. Our authentic self has a gentle child-like ease to it that’s a cinch to shift into. Once you’ve been there and you feel how great it is, you’ll want to spend more and more time living from that place. The freedom of knowing that as adults, we get to choose who we spend our time with is another supportive bonus. If there are people who don’t support you living and being authentic… then you get to reduce your contact with them as much as you like. It’s freeing and liberating to give yourself permission to be your fabulous, real authentic self. Woo Hoo! Nothing feels as good as living from your genuine self. You start to realize how unhappy it makes you to try and pretend that you’re anyone else. And you feel less and less desire to spend time with anyone who doesn’t love and accept you for being you. When we live authentically in the moment we are conscious; being free to choose what to think, feel, say and do whatever most supports us in each moment. Living authentically allows us to consciously choose to create the body, life and happiness you deserve. 

Go on, just be you and see what difference it makes in your life!

Trusting your Body

As I sit here and feel my baby girl move around inside me, I marvel at the miracle of what my body is capable of; without conscious orchestration from me, it has created a life!

How often do we really celebrate the magnificence of our body, let alone even spend a moment contemplating it?

Many of our natural bodily functions happen effortlessly, such as breathing, our heart beating, the digestion of our food. We teach intuitive eating as a means to reconnect with the innate wisdom our bodies possess. When we trust that our bodies are trying to guide us, and then learn to listen to what they are saying, weight loss and wellness can come easily.  

So where do you start if you’ve spent a lifetime ignoring and disconnecting from your body, believing it is untrustworthy or broken in some way?

Here are some suggestions of how our clients have begun to trust their bodies and move closer to total health, wellness and happiness:

·         Go to bed when you’re tired, no book, no TV, no distractions…sink into a peaceful slumber.

·         Ask yourself when you’re hungry “What do I truly feel like eating? Sweet, savoury, crunchy or salty, feel the difference when you really ‘hit the spot’.

·         Be completely present while you eat, savour the taste, the texture, the smell of your food.

·         Get close to nature, bare feet on the grass, walk in the fresh air, soak up some sunshine.

·         Have a bath, bubbles, candles, soothing music, the works!

·         Get a massage, facial or foot rub.

·         Express those pent up emotions, cry when you’re sad, laugh out loud when something is funny, shout into your pillow in anger if you feel disrespected, or sing at the top of your lungs when you feel joyous.

How many times do you ignore your intuitive promptings in a day because you’re too busy or you choose to make something (or someone) else more important? Choose to do one thing today that supports your body and makes you feel good.

“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live”.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The Power of Self-Love and living with authenticity

Anna (not her real name) has been a People Pleaser for years. After going through two abusive relationships, she became intensely passionate about helping other women break free from abuse. She has spent much of her time, energy and vitality extending her hand to other women, so much so that her own health and well being has suffered. Now after many years of service to others, she has reached a new conclusion. The most important person to help and save first, is yourself. 

No amount of giving, service and kindness to others can ever help ourselves heal unless we first extend that gift of love and compassion to ourselves.

No matter how pure our intentions are to help and bless others, when we turn our backs on ourselves and neglect our deepest needs, we fall short of being able to truly give anything of real value to those around us.

Anna has decided to take time for herself, she shared… “I’m just going to be with me for a while”. After years of giving her time, energy and love she has realised that the one who needed it the most was with her all along.

Something special happens when you’re in the company of someone who is self-loving, self-accepting, and lives with authenticity. You can feel their power and how it also extends to your own soul and that of others a matching sense of peace, joy and love.

Authenticity is about developing an honest and loving relationship with who you really are. Not the person you wish you were, not the person you tried to mold yourself into, not even the person others tried to convince you that you were.

Allowing the fabricated concept of ourselves to fall away, allows us to finally perceive the real truth of who we are. To connect and embrace the ofttimes uncomfortable duality of our own raw true self. The sinful and pure nature we all own; our intelligence and stupidity, our generosity and greed… No excuses, no denial… just a comfort with the paradox of being everything and nothing all at the same time.

 When we take the courageous leap to simply accept and love ourselves unconditionally we have given the most powerful gifts available to all of humanity - the gifts of self-love and authenticity.