Achieving goals by themselves will never make us happy; it's who you become that gives you the most fulfillment.

To wrap up our recent focus on goals, I’d like to conclude with this final blog:

I’ve always been someone who likes to achieve, someone who enjoys the satisfaction of accomplishment. However each time I set a goal and saw it fulfilled… the moment would not linger long until I was set upon another goal… years went by and anything I had said to myself that I wanted to achieve had been achieved… and yet where was the fulfillment? I felt ripped-off… Like something was lacking…

Aren’t we taught that goal achievement and success/fulfillment come hand in hand? So why didn’t I feel successful/fulfilled?

Have you ever set yourself a goal, achieved it and felt great for a time… but found the achievement falling short of the lasting satisfaction you thought it would bring?

I’ve heard this a lot in weight-loss… women can spend years wanting to lose weight… they finally get there… only to realize that it doesn’t hit the spot? This problem is so endemic in the weight-loss field. I’ve spoken with women who are so disappointed that losing weight alone didn’t satisfy them, that they simply put it all back on… But alas that doesn’t fix the problem either.

 I’ve found that fulfillment is not in the achieving of goals per se… It’s in becoming the person who accomplished them. One goal will never hit the spot, it’s an attitude and confidence of knowing that you can obtain, achieve and find anything that your heart truly desires that is the real source of satisfaction. Living life with a belief in your own personal power and capacity to achieve/overcome anything could well be the ‘holy grail’ we all seek?

Anthony Robbins puts its best, “Goals are a means to an end, not the ultimate purpose of our lives. They are simply a tool to concentrate our focus and move us in a direction. The only reason we really pursue goals is to cause ourselves to expand and grow. Achieving goals by themselves will never make us happy in the long term; it's who you become, as you overcome the obstacles necessary to achieve your goals, that can give you the deepest and most long-lasting sense of fulfillment.” 

So, go on set your goals, achieve them… and grow and expand yourself in the process. Continue to stretch yourself to new horizons, new perceptions of yourself and life, see what there is to see and dare to want to see more.

The Power of Positive Feelings to Help Motivate you for Longer!

 

We’ve had a theme of goal setting and motivation at the beginning of this year. Today’s blog will deepen into the power you can wield once you discover the difference between the two types of motivation. We all understand that constant motivation is crucial when it comes to getting started on losing weight and maintaining the process to get to your goal and then beyond.

So how can we stay motivated for longer?

You know yourself better than anyone else knows you on the planet. You need to be able to use your power of focus to concentrate on the reasons why you want to lose weight. It’s thinking about why we want to do something that will give us the fuel of motivation. It’s very important to understand that not all feelings of motivation are equal. There are two types of motivation; and varying degrees of fuel located within each.

The type of motivation that peaks up high and then dips down low is what we call ‘Negative Motivation’. It's great for getting us started. It's the most common way that women motivate themselves to lose weight. It’s about focusing on a reason to lose weight that feels bad or negative. For example, ‘I have to lose weight or my partner will cheat on me’, ‘I have to lose weight so that I don’t have to go on more medication’ or ‘I have to lose weight, so my old friends won’t say anything about my weight at the reunion’. Notice how fear based and heavy these reasons to lose weight feel. Negative motivation starts with a high kick, but soon dives down low. 

On the other hand positive motivation is a constant… starting from a lower point, it gradually rises and then peaks in an exponential curve that goes onward and upward. Examples of positive motivation to lose weight are: ‘I have to lose this weight, to free myself’, ‘I have to lose weight to show my children I care about myself, ‘I have to lose this weight, to look on the outside, as good as I feel on the inside.’

Don’t pay attention so much to the words of these sentences, notice how you feel when you say them. The examples of positive motivation are not exclusively ‘positive motivation’ for all people either. They are merely common examples of words that a high majority of people do feel good about. It’s crucial to use your emotional awareness to pick up whether you feel positive or negative when you contemplate your most important reasons to lose weight. 

Finally, Zig Zigglar said it well, “Some say that motivation doesn’t last, well neither does bathing that’s why we recommend it daily”. We do not judge positive and negative motivation as inherently good or bad; they merely have different functions. Negative motivation is great to get you going in a big way, however for sustainable results you need to uncover positive motivation to benefit from it over the long run. Go on, think about what makes you feel negative motivation to start losing weight, great... That will help you get started. Now pause to think what is a good feeling reason why I want to lose weight that will support me over the long run to get to my goal. 

Get into your goals and maintain momentum with these tips

It’s the New Year… our minds are clear about what we want to accomplish this year. Right now is about getting started… or is it. I would encourage you to look back on what you tried last year and evaluate how effective it was for you. If you set yourself a goal last year, got into it easily, maintained momentum and accomplished it – Then this blog is not for you. If however, you set a goal, struggled to start, and didn’t reach the mark… then read on.

Let’s pin-point the real problem and set you up for success.

Starting with goal setting: If your goal is the same one you had at this time last year, change it. You only want to choose to focus on goals that you honestly, deep down inside really want to achieve. And if you didn't accomplish it last year, it probably wasn't that important to you. You want goals that excite you! Goals that light you up! Goals you know are deeply and truly important to you now.

TASK: Write down the three most important things that you want to accomplish, focus on the ones that make you feel alive… Now rate there level of importance to you. 1 is not important and 10 is the most important. Circle the goal that is most important to you. 

1)……………………………… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

2)……………………………… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

3)……………………………… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Now let’s focus on getting started. With your goal in mind, and knowing yourself as well as you do, write down the top 5 actions that need to be performed consistently to accomplish your goal. I’ll provide two examples to be clear.

Example 1) 5kg Weight-loss: Drink 2L of water, enjoy 30mins of activity, only eating when hungry, finish when satisfied and think positive thoughts about yourself. 

Example 2) Save $2000: set up and stick to a financial budget, focus on why you want the $2000, put aside $40 every week for one year, be resourceful and cut costs wherever possible and think abundant wealthy thoughts daily.

TASK: Write down the 5 things that you need to do regularly in order to accomplish your goal:

1)

2)

3)

4)

5)

Once goals are broken down like this, it’s easy to understand how much focus is required in order to accomplish one goal. That’s why it’s so crucial to only choose goals that you really want, you only want something that is worth the effort. 

Once you accomplish one goal, it’s easier to set another one, and onward and upward you go. Anthony Robbins said that we overestimate what we can accomplish in one year and underestimate what we can accomplish in ten. So relax and start at the very most important thing first, trusting that over time you can accomplish all of your hearts desires. 

Lastly, the achievement of any goal is easy if you merely maintain the momentum of your actions. So what is the easiest thing you can do to keep the momentum? It’s all about feeling good! I’ve already thrown in hints earlier... In order to drop 5kg, the most important thing is to: think positive thoughts about yourself daily. Similarly when saving $2000, you need to think wealthy thoughts daily. Why? Because feeling good is motivation, feeling good is why you want what you want. A lot of people think they need something to help them feel good. Some people say to themselves, "If I was 5 kg lighter I would be happier"… This is a myth… being 5kg lighter doesn’t make you happy… not in the long run. It’s thinking about being happy that makes you happy. Go ahead, think about having what you want most right now… Think of how excited, grateful and full of joy you will be when you reach your goal… See yourself there in your mind, hear the sounds, feel the feelings of having what you want most… Yep your happy. You have the power to make yourself happy and feel good whenever you want. So continue to do this consistently and before you know it, you'll be there!